Demotivational Syndrome (3/10)

I just realized that I have developed Demotivational Syndrome.  I don’t know much about Demotivational Syndrome caused by other agents, but when it comes to weed, I’ve done a bit of reading.  This link I think perfectly describes it (http://www.rollitup.org/marijuana-news-around-globe/91837-why-smoking-joint-could-wolf.html).  Basically it’s when chronic weed smokers develops apathy. 

 

Many cannabis smokers denies that this phenomenon exists because of the lack of scientific evidence that cannabis causes Demotivational Syndrome (Demotivational is not even in the ordinary English dictionary by the way).  But personally, what’s being said in this article is exactly whats happening to me.  The reason why I think I am able to identify that this is what is happening to me is because I have the increased ability to reason because of my level of education (did I mention before that this is a painful topic, well …..).  Besides the things happening to me as described in the article, which I don’t believe is just plain coincidence, I generally just feel demotivated to do anything, except this new business thing that I’m trying out for now.  I also feel that if I don’t catch a wake up and get back to basics, that I may just be a dropout and not complete my PhD.  Which is not necessarily a bad thing because I have done more studying compared to 95% of people in this world.  So I wouldn’t end up down and out.  I can basically work for almost any company tomorrow just from the abilities I’ve gathered from my studies so far.  But I need to finish this thing to make me feel satisfied with myself.

at home (4/10)

So I’ve just come home from the park where I had a smoke.  I always had to drive about 15min to get some dooby, but I found out that somebody is selling not too far from me.  Actually, its within walking distance.  Well that’s great.  But also found out that the police comes to that house and raid frequently, which means you must be careful when going there. 

 

Nevertheless, I sit in the house and I’m high and hungry as hell, but no worries, I made myself a burger sandwich, so I’m satisfying the void. 

 

On a different note, I’m avoiding going to campus, cos whenever I get there I start to feel depressed.  Research is a bastard.  And then there is the politics.  Yes, there can be a shit load of politics between postgraduate students and lecturers.  There is always someone trying to be better than the next.  It makes me sick sometimes, but I’ve realized that we may need to work with people like this one day.  I better learn how to work with them now.  And then there is faulty lab managers.  Don’t get me wrong, I want to finish my degree, but I don’t want to go to varsity.  Go figure.   I have always felt like this in the past.  I remember when I was in grade 10 when I wanted to quit school.  But I always said that I made it this far, so I may as well stick it out and finish.  That’s why I’m doing a bloody PhD.

 

But I’m getting stuck with some more interesting stuff as well.  I have come up with a new product for my company.  This product will deal with hangovers.  Enough said!!  I only have to figure out how to turn almost no money into a major business.  If there’s a will, there’s a way.  Am I high, or am I making sense?  I dunno.  But I should have a prototype of the product soon.